Sent this morning from TBR
Gentlemen,
Suffice to say, I had NO IDEA how far my softball skills had atrophied until last night, and as a result, I have never been on more tilt than I was while racing back through the forest in left field hopelessly chasing moon shots while avoiding street signs. By my count, I had two balls bounce off my glove, was flailing on the ground on three separate occasions, pulled the old sixth grade "race in, then panic and race backwards as the ball is flying over your head" job (unforgivable), was 0-for-4 at plate getting (incredibly) jammed 3 times, gave our opponents at least 4 extra outs, caused Freeze to suffer a mild hernia due to laughter, and finally, accidentally (and loudly) farted in front of Scott's girlfriend (and I know this because of her laughter and the startled and shocked look on her face that said,"wow, you are complete fucking mess!"). In a word, I was atrocious.
Driving home, it occurred to me that the last time I played softball was 8 years and 30 pounds ago. I am a fat, fucking loser.
Poker tomorrow?
J. Randal Brown
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