Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Balls Out!

Whom do you think will be the first Batface to get a pair of these?

(My money is on Tulsa or Son of Sue.)


Balls Out Jeans - Watch more free videos

Seriously, the Batfaces should look for some co-branding on this.

ALT HED (for Sommer): Ball Out

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

And the Award Goes to...(Episode 5)

Wow! A double post today (but not nearly as good as the prior one). Must be the cocaine. Just kidding. Seriously though. Anyone know where I can get some. Not really asking for me, but Sommer is having issues at the homestead and could use the help.

OK, so this will the shortest and simplest award post...

Batface Poker Player of the Year

Easy. Celeste. No contest. Closest a Batface has ever come to a final table at the WSOP. Read more here.

Also, Eric is a great roommate unless you actually expect to him to follow up on his promise to give you a back rub.

And the Award Goes to...(Episode 4)


Batface Ballsiest Move of the Year

(Note: After hoisting a few at happy hour today with this Batface and this Batface, I was clearly reminded that I am woefully behind on my list of annual awards. I'll try to catch up. IN the meantime, enjoy this).

Anyway, this category was a one horse race.

After making something like $10 billion in the last two years, Batface Scott Fawcett decided that golf was much cooler than money. In the process he set out to qualify for the PGA Tour. That's right, kids. The PGA Tour. Not some random grabass barbecue circuit, but the P-fuckin' GA.

To do so, he would have to survive three (or maybe it was four) rounds of qualifying against many of the best golfers in the nation. Even if he made it to the brutal final qualifying stage, he would be playing against some of the best young players in the country as well as many grizzled veterans from PGA Tours past.

Let's put this in perspective. I'm better than at least 98 percent of the golfing populace and I am a distant third amongst the Batfaces. The happiest of all Batfaces is an admirable second. Sir Scott is the clear favorite. Unfortunately, I can't scratch either one's ass on the golf course...and Cap'n Happy Pants is a distant follower to Scott (who has taken a new lease on life and exiled his alcohol-fueled alter ego, "Steve," to another planet). Scott is that damn good.

However, to live his dream, he would have to play his best..and he just about did. He was amazing in the qualifying rounds, including an incredible four-round, 39-under masterpiece at Pine Valley. In the end, he narrowly missed the big show, but automatically qualified for spots on some of the minor league tours and he could qualify for a few Tour events via early-week qualifiers. Look for Mr. Fawcett in an upcoming weekend telecast soon.

Unfortunately, Scott's attempt to chase the dream wasn't even a close second. The Ballsiest Move of the Year actually belongs to Scott's now-wife. With a successful legal career in progress, the to-be-Mrs. Fawcett responded to Scott's marriage proposal with a hay maker. Actual transcript of the discussion follows:

Scott: Rebecca, will you marry me?
Rebecca: Yes.
Scott: You've made me so happy.
Rebecca: Uh...ok...great.
Scott: We'll be a great team. I'm going to play on the PGA tour and you'll be my beautiful and talented lawyer wife.
(Pause)
Rebecca: Sorry, I was just on the phone.
Scott: Oh, with who?
Rebecca: My boss. I just quit my job.
Scott: Uhhh...
Rebecca: That poker table has to go.
TBR: Go Batfaces!
(end scene)

Congratulations, Mrs. Scott Fawcett!

Friday, January 09, 2009

Saturday, January 03, 2009

NFL Picks - Playoff edition

Atl @ Arz 1
Ind -PK @ SD
Bal -3.5 @ Mia
Phi @ MIn +3