Is Omaha H/L the new diet poker?

Great post on Pokerati regarding energy drinks and their frighteningly close comparison to poker. I've been playing a lot of Omaha on line, and last night I (accidently) played in an PL Omaha high/low tourney (never thought there was such a thing), finishing second. I think Omaha, particularly PL, is growing in popularity online, reflecting the already rampant popularity among the gamble-happy euros. I've noticed that sugar free red bull is ALSO gaining popularity. Coincidence? I think not, especially when one considers the money and politics. etc.

More Reason To Fear Cardrooms

A card game in New York did not end well for a 55-year-old mathematician after the guys in masks with guns showed up.

Supernova--Part 1

Okay, this catharsis is a long time coming. Heading into the Main Event, once again, I hadn’t play near as many tournaments as I would have liked, but my results in live tournaments this year have been very good. More importantly, my style of play in the early going of tournaments of late had allowed for me to accumulate a lot more chips than I normally do at the early stages.

Since I bought in late, I was seated in seat 10, which I hate. The good news is that gave me a very good view of Shannon Elizabeth’s tramp stamp (she was in seat 4 at the adjacent table). As we were waiting for the tournament to start, I looked around at my tablemates. No known players. Good. The only player of note, seated directly to my right in seat 9, was some Euro who was talking with Katja Thater. I assumed he would be playing a Scandi/German style aka LAG.

I decided to play the Main Event while listening to my iPod, which is actually a very tough decision for me. Usually, I prefer to listen to the action and not get distracted, but I decided that mostly non-vocal pieces might work. The WSOP is SO loud, you basically have to use something. My iPod line-up, on random shuffle:

Beethoven’s 9th
Mozart
The Mission by Enno Mericone, as played by YoYo Ma (really, this is a classic)
Theme to Rudy
Gonna Fly Now (Rocky)
Theme to Schindler’s List
Stars Wars theme song
Imperial March (Star Wars)
Silent Night (Enya)
Don’t Stop Believin’

50-100:

The button was in seat 10 (Hooray!), and before I had a chance to settle in, seat 7 had raised to 300, seat 9 called, and I looked down at two red aces. Shit. What’s the first thing that goes through your mind when you get dealt aces on the first hand of the main event? “Great, I’m going broke. Right. Fucking. Now.” I raised to 1,200 and both called (Yikes!). Flop came 9 high, uncoordinated. Checked to me, and I bet 2,000. Seat 7 called, and my scary Euro friend folded. The turn was a blank, and it went check-check. The river paired the 9, and after a small think, 7 checked. I happily checked behind and won the hand. Up to 4,500 on the first hand, yo!

Within the next orbit and a half, I was dealt AK three times. I won the first two hitting an ace or a king on the flop, and I folded the third from the small blind when it was raised in front of me (absurdly weak-tight, but just had a funny karma feeling). I played a few more small pots during the first level, and I think I won every single one, rarely to showdown. At the end of level 1, I had 37,500. Great start.

100-200:

Level 2 was fairly uneventful for me, and I don’t recall any major hands. Seat 4 proved to be one of the craziest donks I’ve ever seen. He swung from 10k to 40k twice during the level, and he called a 13k bet on the river with jack-high. Jack-HIGH. The best part was his opponent said “nice hand” and turned over a higher jack-high. Wow. I must have won a few small pots, probably with some safe-ish stealing, and I end the level with 41,400.

200-400

Level 3 seemed to get the game out of the dirt. People at our table started busting, and there were a lot more flops. I was hovering around 45k when this hand came up: I made it 1300 to go with kings in the hijack. 4 called, including both blinds. The flop came Q92r. The small blind (what appeared to be a good, solid player) bet out 2,000 and got one caller. I thought about folding (is that insane?!) for a second just because I didn’t want to play a a big pot with an overpair against a bet and call. Then I decided he must be leading with AQ to see where he was and made it 6,000 to go, the SB folded, and the initial caller called. The turn was a 7, and he check-called 6,000 more. The river was a blank, and he checked. I probably missed a value bet to AQ here, but I didn’t want to get raised with just an overpair, so I checked, and my kings were good. At the end of the level, I was among the day 1c leaders with 70,500, and I hadn’t faced any real decisions. Things were going unbelievably well. We headed off to dinner

You know you're running good in Omaha when...

you are sitting in the SB with KhKdAs5s, see a flop of Ks7s2s 6-handed, check it, and it's bet pot and called in 4 spots in front of you.

Go main event buy-in.

Go batfaces.

Touchy, are we?

While sweating fellow Batface Austin Pete in a tournament on Full Tilt, Clonie Gowen was moved to his table. I asked Clonie, "Who is your favorite Batface?". No response. 5 minutes later she busted out when her pocket TT (thanks Fawcett) couldn't improve against someones QQ. (Gotta win races.) I offer my condolences and 3 seconds later I receive this email...

Hello Zach,

It has come to our attention that you have been abusing your chat
privileges at the Pro tables. We value all players and wish to cultivate
an environment in which they can play without being harassed or called
names at the Pro tables.

A copy of the offending chat is shown below:

ImZach (Observer): tough luck Clonie, see you at the
Hooker Bar?

We have revoked your chat privileges at this time for a period of one
month, after which time they may be reinstated upon your request. Any
attempt to circumvent this suspension may result in the permanent
closing of your account.

We thank you for your cooperation in this matter, and wish you best of
luck at the tables.

Regards,

Sherri
Full Tilt Poker Support

murmur

Bot Limit

No time to really talk about this right now, but it's cool and neat:
http://www.cs.ualberta.ca/~games/poker/man-machine/
Phil Laak and Ali Eslami are taking on the newest and meanest poker computerbot today in a nifty 'duplicate match' (double blind?) --- the same cards will be dealt simultaneously in the Laak-Bot match *and* the Eslami-bot match (which takes place in a seperate room), but the bot will have the opposite hand against Eslami. Assuming it doesn't just use that info to know what each person has, sounds like a very reasonable way to compare skills. Follow the action live from the link above. Also, its awesome that Laak wears sunglasses when playing against the computer.

Tight is Wrong

Batface in Main Event

At the first break, TBR is up to 36,900 tc.

SNG domination

We pick up this match 12 hands in....

Hand 13: Tiny B vs. noND and its a dead heat.

Hand 16: On a board of 8J7AQ, nd bets out 120 into a 160 pot. TB folds. ND dominating

Hand 21: a raise preflop by nd means its time for a reraise by TB. Aggression wins once again. TB takes the lead

Hand 32: booorrriiinnnng

Hand 36: TB raises big preflop and nd fold. TB then shows 'the todd" and the crowd goes wild.

Hand 40: TB is very limpy. Calls a bet on the AK4 flop, check the K turn and bets out 180 on the river. ND folds. TB shows a Jack high bluff. ND very tilty...

hand 41: MAN DOWN!!! ND raises to 180 preflop, tb reraises to 450 and ND pushes. ND show the zach (QJ off) and Tiny B tables AA. The board blanks out and we are a full $11 richer. Ship it!!!!

Watch and learn, bitches

Tiny B is in a high-stakes heads-up sit-and-go on FT. And im here to report it. Go Batfaces and good luck all in!

Hand 2: Big raise by Tiny B, TJstone thinks and mucks. TB up.

Hand 7: Flop is 763 rainbow, TJStone bets and TB calls. Turn is a blank. TJ leads out and TB calls. river is an Ace. TJ bets, tb raises and takes it down. Batfaces dominating.

Hand 14: First all in!. TJ limps, tb raises, tj pushes. TB tanks and folds. pussy.

Hand 17: TB getting run over. On a board QQTTblank, TJ bets and TB folds.

Hand 24: MAN DOWN! TJStone open pushes for 1,465 and Tiny B insta-calls. TJ shows A5 and TB turns over AQ. A Queen on the flop and the Batfaces whip another donkey's ass. GO Batfaces!!!

Live blogging the live blogging of the 2-7 triple draw

Lots of action at the final table tonight. We've already lost a couple of players with Todd Brunson going out in 7th place earning him a cool $51,669.

The Thum of Cooking

IJS.

World Series of Bad Beats

Sounds like our fearless leaders have had some pretty horrific, yet eerily similar beats. Freeze busted out of Event 35 ($1,500 NLH) when he went all in with Kings and was called by pocket Jacks. Flop is A K Q, turn is a blank, river is the 10. Man down.

Shane just busted out of Event 38 ($1,500 NLH) when he raised in MP with JJ, big stack puts Shane all in and Shane calls. Big stack shows 88. Flop is J 7 4, turn is 10, river is the 9. Man down.


Go Batfaces!

Go Batfaces!!!

Man down

Just got this text from Tiny B

"I'm Out. Poker sucks. At pool at Caesars. Go vodka and lemonade. Fuck the proclaimers. Tulsa down also. Going to get drunkest ever."

As of 3:00pm Vegas time, Shane and TBR were still alive.

Go Batfaces!

Batface Domination

Our fearless leaders had a very productive first day in Vegas. Tiny B and Tulsa chopped a $175 sat for $800 each. Shane also chopped a sat for
$560. All will be playing in the $1500 donkeyfest today at 12:00 local time. Good luck all in!

Go Batfaces!

Love Me Some Darling

Around midnight last night, I received the following text message from T-Roy (aka Darling), who had already arrived at the WSOP with some of his high-stakes cronies in tow:

"Starting sat(ellite). 1 guy wearing gloves. One with painted black nails. One paraplegic in a wheelchair. Weighs 80 lbs. And the rest can't speak English."

A few hours later:

"That sat worked well. Some weirdos can't play."

Darling up $10k.

Go Batfaces!

Odds to win WSOP main event

according to sprotsbook.com

This isnt the entire list, but in my opinion these were the most interesting. Anyone willing to even bet $1 on Amarillo Slim, Ben Affleck or Jamie Gold?

The favorites are:
Ivey 150-1
Jesus 200-1
Negreanu 200-1
Hellmuth 200-1


Allan Cunningham 400-1
Amarillo Slim 600-1
Amir Vahedi 600-1
Andy Black 400-1
Annie Duke 500-1
Antonio Esfandiari 300-1
Barry Greenstein 600-1
Barry Shulman 500-1
Ben Affleck 800-1
Chip Reese 500-1
Chris Ferguson 200-1
Chris Moneymaker 500-1
Dan Harrington 250-1
Daniel Negreanu 200-1
Dave Ulliott 250-1
David Pham 400-1
David Sklansky 600-1
David Williams 400-1
Doyle Brunson 600-1
Eric Seidel 250-1
Erick Lindgren 300-1
Evelyn Ng 600-1
Freddy Deeb 600-1
Greg Raymer 300-1
Gus Hansen 250-1
Howard Lederer 250-1
Huck Seed 500-1
Humberto Brenes 500-1
Jamie Gold 500-1
Jennifer Harman 600-1
Joe Beevers 600-1
Joe Hachem 600-1
John Juanda 300-1
John Phan 600-1
Johnny Chan 250-1
Marcel Luske 300-1
Men Nguyen 400-1
Michael Mizrachi 300-1
Phil Gordon 500-1
Phil Hellmuth 200-1
Phil Ivey 150-1
Phil Laak 300-1
Sam Farha 500-1
Scotty Nguyen 250-1
TJ Coultier 300-1
Ted Forrest 500-1
Todd Brunson 500-1

Full Tilt accepting debit cards

Public Service Announcement #1893

Just deposited some money into Full Tilt using my debit card. Carry on.

Go BaTVfaces

Finally Randy has something to do at the office while waiting for the next CardPlayer article to get published. (top link)

The loneliest / worst people on earth

hang out at the hotel bar. This place makes me sick. One one side of the bar is nothing but douchebag morons form Kentucky trying to impress their douchebag moron coworkers form Ohio. The other side of the bar is the lonely and twice divorced sales rep from Virginia still working at age 67 and still traveling cross country 9 months a year to put his slutty/ungrateful bitch of a daughter through community college. And all these fuckers want to do is talk. I just want a overpriced, not-sure-its-really-meat cheeseburger, 4 beers, and the Yankee - Rangers game on TV they won't shut the fuck up. The waitress is fat, the bartender may be a dude, and the tv might as well be black and white. So what ends up happening? I drink 6 beers and end up taking 2 shots of vodka. (I love Vodka). I hate these people.

Go Batfaces

What are the odds?

So, uh, I'm good. How have you guys been?

Greatest/worst story ever?

So many interesting things about this story...

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,264880,00.html

Top 5 Batface ideas that sounded great, but turned out not so much

5. Batface Myspace page
4. This blog
3. Heads up Challenge
2. Softball
1. Thum

[Updated] February, March, and Probably Well-Into April Madness

She had a clipboard...

Ok. Top 5 uncomfrontable moments in Batface hisory...(as told by me)

5. Yelling at the Chinese waitress "HONG KONG SUE"
4. HONG KONG SUE slapping Clonie on the ass
3. Gonz taking a swing at Tiny B
2. Scott letting eveyone know how expensive his rug was
1. Tim

Go Batfaces!!!


(feel free to add your own)

I suspected "Sang" was an alias.

And he will be missed.

http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/latestnews/stories/DN-fwshooting_09met.ART.State.Edition2.44587ae.html

Pantheonic

At poker last night, the 2005 DSOP at Shane's was discussed. Here is Shane's e-mail about the events that followed the tourney.

OK, so as best as I can recall...

Todd calls me around 8:30 or so to confirm that the ever-sweet, clean and dainty Amber will be joining us at Bob's for a late dinner. I get to Bob's just before 10pm and Amber is standing outside smoking and talking on the cell phone, which would be her recurring theme for the night.

Inside, I see Todd with a drink in hand, which was surprising because I knew he was more than liquored out. We go to our table and I spend the next hour or so desperately trying to follow a machine-gun-like stream of consciousness dialogue. Seriously, we were never on-topic for more than about 45 seconds. Anyway, here's the gist.

· Turns out Amber is the girl Traci mentioned a few weeks ago who got a DWI. Presumably, that’s why she was guzzling Michelob Ultra…or something.
· Amber broke up with her boyfriend in January. He had no job, but lived in a 7500 square foot home in Lakewood. Instead of going out, Amber says she spent most of her free time helping him decorate. She was disappointed in him because he was 35 and couldn’t get out of his party phase. Her philosophy, “Men have to have a job. If they don’t keep themselves busy, bad things happen.” My weak response, “I have a job.”
· Traci hasn’t had a real boyfriend in about two years. During this relationship, the apparent height of their enjoyment occurred on Sundays during football season. They would sleep late and he would grill steaks and whatnot during the games. Then they all got high. Traci found the experience to be “relaxing.”
· Although I can’t remember how the topic came up, at one point Traci started talking about some of her friends. Apparently, someone was trying to get someone else to fuck them with a dildo, but the other person was just into regular fucking, so the dildo became an issue. Todd, if this one resonates better with you, please advise.
· Traci and Amber attended Canyon Creek Christian Academy, but both were expelled when they were caught drinking underage at a party. Traci’s mother was a teacher there, so she was re-admitted, but Amber got hosed. Apparently, the new principal was an over-controlling hypocrite and he was out to get Traci after she engaged in a supposed threesome. Traci claimed it was just “hearsay”.
· After we finished dinner, we decided to go to Dragonfly. Well, Traci and Amber decided on Dragonfly. I was still contemplating the hearsay incident. Anyway, when the valet brought me my rental car (in the case a truck), tiny little Amber literally grabbed the oh shit handle and in a combination vault/high bar move, athletically swung herself into the truck. I had to hide my boner.
· On the way to Dragonfly, Amber kept trying to call her friend Misty who was at the Mavs game. She had left her charger at Misty’s house the week before and hadn’t been able to get it. When Misty didn’t answer the first call, she called her 8 more times. This would be another recurring trend for the evening.
· However, at some point Amber brought out this story. I have no idea how we got on this topic. She mentioned that a friend of her’s had been in Korea and was hooking up with a Korean girl. The girl kept saying “be in me, be in me” but the guy thought she was saying “pee in me, pee in me”. So the guy takes a leak inside her potty spot. Amber summed up the story by saying, “That Korean girl was pretty mad.”
· We get to Dragonfly and the place is packed. Traci and Amber both know about 50 percent of the people in the bar. Traci knows the bartender, so we get a round of drinks and shots. Todd frowns when the drinks get there and I advise him to fight through it.
· At the bar, some guy is there from Houston (presumably just went to the game). Although Traci claims she said nothing to him, he told her to “shut her big hole.” Todd didn’t see the altercation, but after hearing about it, he wanted to go find the guy and punch him. Apparently energized by the recent round of shots, Todd was now fightin’ mad. Great.
· As we made our way outside to the pool, Amber said that some guy tried to hit on her. His line to her was “Hello, what do you do?” This has significance later.
· When we get to the pool, Amber sees her friend Misty, the one she had been trying to reach. Misty was extremely drunk and pissed off. I then committed a tactical error when Amber introduced us.
o Amber: Misty, this is Shane.
o Misty: Hello.
o Shane: Ahhhhh, Misty. You’re the one with Amber’s phone charger. She’s been cursing your name for the last hour.
o Misty didn’t say another thing to me for the rest of the night.
· So, here we are sitting by the pool and it is amazing that even though it is obvious that the two girls are there with us, probably half a dozen guys walk up to them and hit on them right in front of us. It made for some entertaining theater.
· The “what do you do” guy shows up and sits down next to Amber and starts putting the moves on her again. She calmly deals with him, and I intentionally offer no help for about 10 minutes. Finally, I interrupted their discussion and said, “Hello, my name is Shane. What do you do?” Amber laughed and I now moved in to deal with this ass-clown. Not only was he drunk, he was incredibly stoned and had just broken up with his girlfriend. That didn’t prevent him from showing naked pictures of her he had stored in his camera phone. Turns out he was a dentist and he offered me “free crowns, fillings, anything. Just help me with this girl.” Amber heard this and immediately glared at him. I responded, “Dude, she’s my girlfriend. We’ve been dating for three years.” Quickly changing gears, he responds with, “Wow, she’s awesome. You have to set me up with one of her friends.” It took about 20 minutes to get rid of him, even Todd got involved. Meanwhile, Amber gets tied up with another miscreant. I walked over to ask her if he wanted another drink and she quickly grabs me and introduces me to the guy she’s been talking to. “Hey, Chris, this is Shane. He’s my husband. We’re celebrating our third wedding anniversary.” The look on his face was clearly of the “you’ve got to be fucking kidding me” variety.
· With it getting late, I was ready to get the hell out of there as was everyone else. Even Traci announced she was “so over Dragonfly.” Amber was again trying to find Misty. As we’re just getting the car from valet, Amber’s phone rings and it’s Misty telling her to stay. Amber gave me an awkward look. I told her I was done and she should stay with her friends. I got the “you’re so sweet reply” and left. When I got home, I drank a quart of bleach.

My reply to Shane about the rest of the evening....

Shane - Very well done.
Traci and I leave Dragonfly and head back to the Monk, where her cars is (she and Amber met there and took a cab to Bobs). As we're on the way, she frantically remembers she is supposed to bring a cheesecake to Mother's Day lunch tomorrow and calls a Fireside manager and arranges for us to pick one up. We walk into Fireside and they have the cake waiting. It's $50, and Traci starts looking through her purse as if she doesn't have the money.
Apparently remembering that I saw her take home $300 earlier in the day, she pulls out a wad of cash and pays for the cake. As we leave Fireside, she starts to fall, but I catch her and I don't drop the cake in the process...I've always had good hands. She is very drunk. All night she's been talking about having to go to church with her mom at 8AM and how she wasn't staying up past midnight. It's 1:40 when we enter the Monk. We immediately go sit at the bar and of the 86 people in the bar at this time, about 73 hug and/or kiss Traci. We order drinks and put them on the tab Amber and Traci started earlier in the night but didn't pay when they came to Bobs. Traci, the waitress that looks like Kristin and the tall waitress that loves Adam start doing shots. I decline. Last call at 2, lights on at 2:15, bar empties except for employees by 2:30. I end up paying the $55 bar tab of which I had one drink. We head to the parking lot, we're both unsure she can make it home despite living less than a mile away, so we hang out in the parking lot for 20-30 minutes, we kiss goodnight and I head home. As I instructed, she calls me when she gets home and that is the evening. I realize I'm quickly moving into the non boyfriend, nice guy friend-role that I've had with others in the past. Next time we go out, I'm making sure she doesn't have a car, so I can hold her against her will.

Heads-Up-Date

HULB Final

Son of Sue - 2
Grifter - 1

Much quicker rubber match. I came out more aggressive and it payed off in the end. On the 16th hand, I raised with 99 on the button. Call. Flop comes A93, 2 hearts. I bet half the pot. Quick call. Turn is a 5. I bet the pot, he goes all in and I call. He turns over A5 and the river doesnt help. Man down.

HULB 4

Son of Sue - 1
Grifter - 1

I was crippled when i slow played KK into a boat. Lost when A2 lost to K4 on the river.

HULB 3

Son of Sue - 1
Grifter - 0

He was short stacked, got it all in fron the SB with J8. Called with Q4. Boated on the river.

HULB 2

got it back to even. BLinds are getting up there. 40 80, 1500 starting chips. Playing the player, not the cards. This will be over soon.

Heads-up live blogging

The Grifter and I are are currently playing our first round game. I'm in New York, hes in Dallas. We are on Full Tilt as well as iChat. So we can see and hear each other. Middle of the first game and we cant play any more passive. Hes at an almost 2-1 chip advantage. largest pot so far was only about 300.

Tunica Hand 2: Results

Thanks for the comments. At the time, I pretty much hated the way I played the hand up to this point, but in hindsight, I think I might have ended up playing the hand okay for the wrong reasons. I don't think you can fold jacks pre-flop there, especially in a relatively fast tournament (40 min. levels). It's either call or raise, and I think most people prefer raise. I prefer to call and see what develops. If you raise there, I think you are committed to the hand. Plus, if you call, you might just get the bluff money from AK on the flop and get them to lay down without seeing all 5 cards. Finally, it gives you an opportunity to get more info from the raiser on the flop.

When the two players called behind me, it changed the dynamic of the hand. Now when seat 3 leads out with a 3/4 pot bet, it's looking (to me) even more likely that he has an overpair to my jacks. Tough spot to try and run AK through 3 people. I folded. The button folded. Seat 1 immediately goes all-in. Seat 3 sighs, and rather quickly makes a reluctant call with what I'm sure is aces or kings. I'm patting myself on the back at this point. Of course, he has AKo. Seat 1 has pocket nines. Turn is a jack for an unneeded nut-kick.

On the very next hand I get pocket jacks again and raise to $600. Seat 3 goes all in for around $1500 total, and I call. He has A8o (the old Randy) and spikes an ace on the river. Shortly thereafter, I'm gone.

Tunica Hand 2

In my earlier post, I eluded to an awful hand I played during event no. 12. Well, here it is:

We are in level three. Blinds are 50-100, and I’ve worked my starting stack from 2000TC up to 4200. I was down to 1600, but then I managed to get it all in on the flop against Wendell Barnes with an overpair to the board. He called with two overcards and a flush draw, but I managed to get lucky in the hand and hang on.

Seat 3 seemed to be a good, solid player who’d finished second in Event #9. Seat 1 was a wild man, anxious to get his chips in with any marginal hand. They both had around 8,000 in chips, leaders at the table. I was in seat 5. In the hand in question, Seat 3 is UTG, and Seat 1 is in the SB.

Seat 3 raises to $500. He had raised UTG one other time and showed down AQ to win the hand, but for some reason, I felt that was a rare, loose opening for him in that position. I felt he was very strong. I look down at pocket jacks. I call. Button calls. Seat 1 calls in the small blind. Big blind folds. 5 players to the flop, 2200 in the pot.

Flop is 762r. UTG leads out for 1500. I feel like he is very strong at this point. What’s your move? Results to come.

Batfaces Represent, NBA All-Star Weekend Style

First, let's hope this is my last post EVER with my current POS PC. With my sweet new computer en route, I could be good for as many as three or four extra posts this year.

Now, while while the rest of us sit at home during the February doldrums and either have hate-sex with our wives or insult our friends, fellow Batface Scott Fawcett has ventured to Las Vegas to:

(1). hang out with his fiancee and her parents

(2). play some motherfucking poker

(3). take in the NBA All-Star Weekend and hang out with the typical NBA All-Star fan

As of this writing, Scott has made the final three tables of the $1000 twice-daily buy-in event at the Bellagio. Among the remaining players are this guy, this guy and, of course, this guy. Best of luck Scott.

Tomorrow, Scott plans to take in the All-Star spectacle with his new found friends.

In other news, there may be a shocking, cataclysmic heads-up match forming between two Batfaces. While early money might be on this heads-up specialist, the smart cash will likely support this douchebag.

P.S. Some portions of this post might be inaccurate.

P.P.S. Am I the only person who gets misty at least three times during every airing of Tin Cup?

P.P.P.S. My girlfriend just broke up with me.

P.P.P.P.S. (gun clicking...)

Hello, is this thing on??

Not a lot of posting here lately, so how about some decent online poker talk?  For anyone lucky enough to still have money in an online account, have you found that the play has been much tighter than the normal online chip dump?  Now seeing that I'm a limit poker specialist, I normally play either 5-10 or 8 -16 and the play has been VERY tight since firepay shutdown.  I'm under the assumption that since people can't fund their account easily, people are much more "safe" with their money since they can't just deposit more after going broke chasing a 2 outer to the river.  I have been more profitable the last 4 weeks online than I ever have.  Is this just a limit phenomenon, or is it happening in the no-limit games as well?

Sorry Sang

Has anybody spoken to Sang today? Want to make sure he is ok. After reading this, his life might change.

Sir Charles

Better than Freeze at blackjack.

Tunica Hand 1: Results

Thanks for the comments, well, at least from Gonz. I think his comment probably represents the conventional wisdom. As it turns out, I had pocket nines, felt like I was both ahead and had positive equity in the hand and wanted to stay as aggressive as possible. This is not a hand I would normally play in this spot with this stack, but I definitely would have felt I was ahead as I folded. So I decided to err on the side of aggression and move in this time. By the way, both blinds folded. If either woke up with a monster, I'm an idiot.

I rarely get really specific about what I think everyone has (or the range of what everyone has) in the moment, but rather prefer to trust what I feel recognizing that my feel takes into consideration a lot of factors that I will come to consciously as I reconstruct a hand. (By the way, that is not a reflection of my reading ability at all, but more a reflection of my inability to think very clearly in the heat of the moment.) In this instance, my initial thoughts were the original all-in was not that strong, the call from the cocky kid was not that strong, and the call all-in for less in seat 9 was almost irrelevant. Therefore, I felt like I had everyone beat, and I will gamble against the cocky kid for a chance to go really deep with a big stack and some fold equity (I actually thought it was about 50-50 he would call).

The cocky kid immediately said, “I know what that long look means” (meaning my ten second stare at my cards) and folded AQ face-up. All-in UTG had pocket sevens, and seat nine had A8o. When I turned over my nines, the cocky kid exclaimed, “wow, what a terrible play!” It was kind of awesome. A queen came on the flop, but I dodged an A, seven or two eights and added 15,000 to my stack. Cocky kid then said, “you’re getting a call from me the rest of the way, I can promise you that.”

In looking back, I think the key aspect of my decision to move in with the nines was the likelihood that cocky kid and probably one other of the players was holding an ace, thus cutting down their chances to win. I think cocky kid realized this, too, but probably assumed he was dominated by me anyways (with AA, KK or AK). It would have been interesting to see if he would have folded AK.

By the numbers, it ended up I was risking roughly 5,600 to win 15,000. Pre-flop, our winning chances were as follows:

99 58 %
77 17 %
A8 25 %

That was a little surprising to me as I would have guessed I was somewhere in the high 40s. Now, assuming AQ calls there, I would be risking 19,000 to win 28,000. Here are the winning chances:

99 45 %
77 17 %
A8 6.4 %
AQ 28.5 %

So, either way, it turns out my decision was pretty well support by the math, of course assuming I was right about the strength of my opponents hands.

Tunica Postscript--What did I play and how did I play it? Part 1

Somewhat ironically, the only tournament from the World Poker Open that does not appear on pokerpages.com is the $500 Second Chances Tournament on Sunday, January 14th. So you'll just have to take my word for it that a total of 3 batfaces entered the 185-person field, and two made the final table: Celeste and yours truly (Celeste, after nursing a short stack and getting ridiculously lucky time after time, finished 5th for $4600. I finished 6th, cashing $3900). Scott was eliminated somewhere around 60th place. In any event, I think there were a couple of interesting hands that might be worthy of some comments. I am ultimately pretty happy with the way I played each of them, but I realize that they may not have been played optimally.

The tournament was my third and final event during our Tunica trip, and to that point I'd played pretty lackluster, weak tournament poker. Two things occurred that changed the way I would be play in the final tournament: (1) watching Zach cash in our first event, and seeing how, like at the WSOP, he played fearlessly. Yes, perhaps misguided and overaggressive a times, but he was simply not going to go quietly, and as you looked around his table, you began to recognize the other players seeing that in him and adjusting their play to avoid confrontations with him; and (2) my horrific mistake in the $1,000 NL event (won by Devil Fish). This will be the subject of a later post if I'm man enough to own it.

So coming into our final event, I was dead-set on not being afraid to push chips around and not be pushed around. Fortunately, I managed to get some pretty good hands and chip up early with very few showdowns. Then I played a hand that seemed to confirm my newfound willingness to play faster. I found 8-9 suited in the cut-off and raised. A good player who had a few less chips than me was the only caller in the big blind after a short think. The flop was 876r. He checked to me and I bet half the pot. He called. The turn was a 2, completing the rainbow. He checked again, and I bet half the pot again, now having committed close to 40% of my stack to the pot. He immediately check-raised all in, I quickly called and he tabled AQ. The river blanked and I basically doubled up.

Thereafter, I cruised to the final three tables as probably one of the top five chipleaders. Right about this time, I was moved to a new table.

Hand #1:

I am in seat 4. Seat 6 is the clear chipleader in the tournament with about 50,000. I have around 19,000, third at the table. Seat 8 is an extremely cocky, tattooed and blinged out kid of maybe 24. He has around 24,000 and clearly assumes he will cruise to the final table. Seat 7 has around 5,600, and seat 9 (I think a friend of Scott's) has around 2,000. Blinds are 300-600 with a 50 ante, so each round is costing us 1,350. While I'm well above par and not in blind danger, the blinds are about to go up, and I know that the volatility of the tournament will mean I just can't sit around. I had played maybe 2-3 hands at the new table, and it was my button.

UTG (Seat 7) moves all in for 5600, obviously with some kind of hand, but also realizing he's got to take a stab at the blinds and antes while he's still a threat. Seat 8, our cocky friend, thinks, makes a couple of comments about what he thinks seat 7 might have and calls. His call screams of something like AK, AQ or a middle pocket pair in 99-77 range. I think he would have raised to isolate with any real premium hand as he's looking at adding over 7K to stack. Seat 9 pushes in his last 2,000 getting the proper odds (almost 4-1) to do that with almost anything, and it's folded to me. I look at my cards for a good ten seconds and then move all-in. What's my range? What do you think seat 8 had?

Results to come.

McGill and I Mourn

Loyal Batfaces love the ponies...so we do not love this. But we do love this. And this.

The People You Meet, Part Whatever

Please be advised...the following post IS NOT about poker.

After suffering through a 10-day illness, I was feeling like I could keep my phlegm in control just long enough to get out of the house and be social. Apparently, a trip to my local Indian Restaurant was in order.

On a sidenote, why don't more Caucasians enjoy Indian food? Are they unduly prejudiced or do they sincerely dislike the rich, exotic dishes so deliciously prepared by our Hindu friends? Both my current boss and my future wife won't touch the stuff, which is terribly sad. What gives?

Anyway, after being escorted to my table, I prepared to order my favorite, lamb vindaloo. Unexpectedly, my casual glance through the menu was interrupted by a screaming brat at the table next to me. Fucking kids. Of course, the three women at the same table completely ignored the child and carried on their conversation. Given that two of the women looked similar and the third was considerably older, I took this to be a mother/daughter/daughter/grandchild outing. I contemplated saying something when the oldest woman grabbed her throat and began speaking through an artificial voicebox. However, the sound coming out of this woman's throat/mouth area was horrible. It sounded like a drowning bullfrog...and this old hag was a talker. Seriously, she wouldn't shut up and she must have had the volume on her larynx box (or whatever you call the fucking thing) turned up to 11.

I know, I know. I should feel sorry for her...but I couldn't notice that when both of her daughters spoke, they clearly had that I've-smoked-four-packs-of-camel-unfiltereds-since-I-was-twelve raspiness. Like mother, like daughters.

Even worse, they all dressed and looked like something out of The Sopranos. I couldn't help but think of Lorraine Bracco's line from Goodfellas: "They (the mobsters wives) didn't look very good either. Their clothes were cheap and thrown together. And they looked sort of beaten up." In particular, Grandma had on these awful sunglasses that jiggled on her head every time she grabbed her throat to let loose with that awful mechanized voice. I swear to God, one of the daughters even used the words stugotts as a punchline to a joke that caused them all to go into a rasping, coughing fit.

Fortunately, when my meal arrived, they got up to leave...but they must have been regulars because they stopped at every table to say something..to everybody. At one table, the old hag gargled, "yeah, I got cancer from smoking too much and they had to take out my voicebox."

I stared down at my meal, then back at this troll. Then I left $20 on the table and walked out.

I may never be able to eat Indian food again.

Damn you, Smoke Hag. Damn you.

Son-of-Sue-nica

Batface tournament stud and soon-to-be NY Jets fan Zach Ballenger went deep again last night, finishing 11th out of 240 in the Tunica 500NL event (Top 18 paid). Zach was chip leader with 22 remaining, but suffered back-to-back bad beats. TinyB reports: "I was eliminated in Level 2 when I got it all in with a straight against a flush draw or I would have won." In a brilliant comeback however, Tiny apparently slayed both the blackjack table and a liter of vodka. More coverage over at Pokerati.

And Because Its Always Funny...

Go Poker!

8 of your favorite Batfaces head to Tunica today for a weekend of baffoonery and poker. Unfortunately, it looks like our buddy Clonie is with the Full Tilt crew in Australia at the Aussie Millions, where the absurd $100,000 Tournament begins tomorrow. I came across this little nugget on Paulie's blog for Pokernews.com.

"Tomorrow will be the $100,000 buy-in event. I just saw Andy Bloch wandering around and asked him if he was going to play. He mentioned, "No, unless someone back me." He thinks that Erik Seidel, Erick Lindgren, Phil Ivey, and Clonie Gowan are going to play."

Are you fucking kidding me?

Open letter to Clonie Gowen....

Dear Clonie,

You've owed me $500 since July of 2005. Please pay me.

Sincerely,

Todd

De Gustibus non Disputandem est

The other night, resident Batface Genius Matt Sommer commented that we haven't issued our rankings in a while. I used to compile the rankings while Matt Comstock, my former boss and current Prick-Stick Poster Boy for the New Millennium, collected the accompanying photos.

Since these rankings were not collected in real-time, they quickly became outdated the minute they were produced. This year, a self-ranking system appears to be the best way to go. As such, Batface Swollen Head Randy Brown (aka TBR) is first to issue the following assessment of his play (here referencing a much higher-stakes game than our standard Thursday night Donk-Fest).

It couldn't have played out any better (unless I'd won more, I guess). Troy sucked out me early to the tune of $1600 or so. But I small-balled my way back all night and finished up 2400. Never really had to make any tough decisions or play any big pots. Classic A-game TBR. it was like I was sort of floating above the table with my big bear mits just kind of poking at the soft little bunnies. Plus, Troy owes it to me and is going to give it to me in Tunica (meaning I don't have to lug as much cash out there, which is nice).

Bracelets Are Cheap

The 2007 WSOP Tournament Schedule was released yesterday. It will cost $214,500 to compete in all 55 tournaments. Go Coco.

Fantasy Poker

The First Annual Batface Fantasy Poker Draft is finished. Below are the teams and my predictions

Tiny B - JC Tran, Gavin Smith, Scott Fischman, Tony Cousineau, Max Pescatori, Layne Flack, Rhett Butler, John D'Agastino

TBR - Daniel Negreanu, Nam Le, Roland DeWolfe, Alex Jacob, Nenad Medic, Can Hua Kim, Robert Mizrachi, Nick Shulman

Aaron M - Jamie Gold, Greg Raymer, TJ Cloutier, Devilfish, Carlos Mortenson, John Duthie, Paul Phillips, Randy Brown

Son of Sue - Grinder, Joe Hachem, David Daneshgar, Anthony Reategui, Joe Tehan, Gioi Luong, An Tran, Ralph Perry

Guns - Men Master, John Hoang, Barry Greenstein, Scooty Nguyen, James Van Alstyne, Kathy Leibert, Chad Brown, Eugene Todd

Shane - Phil Hellmuth, Erik Lindgren, David Williams, Michael Binger, Kenna James, Sam Farha, Marcel Luske, Hoyt Corkins

Tulsa - Ted Forrest, David Pham, John Cernuto, Jesus Ferguson, Bill Elder, Al Barberi, Tony Ma, Humberto Brenes

Dan - John Juanda, Steve Wong, Eric Seidel, Huck Seed, Jeff Madsen, Harry Demitriou, Tom Schneider, Annie Duke

Adam - Allen Cunningham, Phil Ivey, Shannon Shorr, Joe Sebok, David Plastik, David Singer, Chris McCormack, Lance Allred

Gonz - Mike Matusow, Jen Harman, Dewey Tomko, Phil Laak, Andy Bloch, Lee Watkinson, Jeffrey Lisandro, Patrik Antonios

Predicted Order of Finish -

1. Tiny B

2. Adam

3. Son of Sue

4. TBR

5. Guns

6. Tulsa

7. Shane

8. Gonz

9. Dan

10. Aaron

Best holder in the NFL

It should be noted that the man to the right is not Tony Romo. Just sayin'.